I guess I had a decent understanding of Greek sculpture before visiting Athens, but it helped me a lot to see it in person. So here’s a quick art history lesson from my visits to National Archeological and the Acropolis Museums, broken down into three time periods:

The Archaic Period (650 – 480 BC)

If you’re in Athens and you see a sculpture of a naked dude (kinda stiff-looking with enviably jacked thighs and a wee smile) he’s a Kouros.

A Kouros is a sculpture of a young man, probably used for a grave marker or to commemorate an athlete.

A Kore is a sculpture of a young lady from the same time period, but she’s always got clothes on. They have these ambiguous smiles you won’t see again in sculpture until Gothic Madonnas come along 2000 years later.

I’m including a close up of this Kore, so you can see the traces of color on her dress. It might be tempting to think that ancient Greeks were some kind of minimalists but nah—they liked bright colors and fancy details on their sculptures.

I love the pleating and draping on this Kore’s dress and her elaborate hairstyle.

The Classical Period (480 – 323 BC)

Right here, this is where it starts: the transition to capital-C-Classical Sculpture. Kritios Boy is giving a hint of the coming contrapposto attractions with his offset hips with the weight bearing down on his leg. To get the full effect I’d need to show you his back view, to see the curvature of his spine, but the Acropolis Museum doesn’t allow you to take picture in the free-standing sculpture gallery and I was busted in the act. (Nope, wouldn’t want to be a security guard in an Athens Museum, constantly rebuking photography scofflaws like me and yelling at teens making funny poses in front of statues “Only normal poses allowed!”).

In the fall of 480 BC, Persians attacked the Acropolis and destroyed the temples and statues (it was rebuild shortly after). Kritios Boy, like a lot of statues in the Acropolis Museum, was pulled out of a ancient pile of rubble made of all the busted up statues and buildings left behind from the Persian attack.

I’ve read occasional news stories about ancient bronze Greek statues discovered underwater by fisherman or divers. I love to imagine it, these thousands of years old bronze gods hauled out of the water to the astonishment of bystanders.

These Athenians were really flexing in the classical era—they were like “Lets go ahead and invent drama, philosophy and (sort of) democracy and then oh, I don’t know, go from stiff looking sculptures to this in a couple of decades?”

The Hellenistic Period (323 BC – 30 BC)

Alright people, hold on to your horses because we are done with the idealism of the Classical era—Hellenistic art is all about naturalism. This kid is clearly scared (wouldn’t you be?) and while looking around the Hellenistic galleries I saw statues that reflected pain, fear and humor. Now that statues of humans didn’t have to resemble Greek gods, they could be old, young even and downright ugly.

These artist were also increasingly more skilled. Check out the details of the jockey’s foot and sandals.

Or let’s say the artists did use gods as their subjects. In the Hellenistic era, they were free to have a laugh about it, as in this delightful sculpture. “Oh Pan, you naughty boy! If you don’t stop being a horny old goat, I shall slap you silly with my slipper!”

How I got to Athens: flight from Chicago.

Where I slept: Amalia Hotel.  Price: €118 for a single. Recommended: yes